UGHH...I''m soo tired. Sorry I haven't written for a while. I had nothing to write about. Just more friggin school. But I found this hilarious thing yesterday...the chuck norris facts. I had heard one at school that wasn't that good (every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten...every time God masturbates chuck norris kills a lion...lol) but I found some that were f ing hillarious. ~The cheif export of Chuck Norris is pain~~Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies
the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing. ~~ Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Indian. ~~ Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean. ~~ There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live. ~~ If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever. ~~ Chuck Norris once bet NASA he could survive re-entry without a spacesuit. On July 19th, 1999, a naked Chuck Norris re-entered the earth's atmosphere, streaking over 14 states and reaching a temperature of 3000 degrees. An embarrassed NASA publically claimed it was a meteor, and still owes him a beer. ~~ Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell "What The Fuck was That? ~~ Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking. ~~ In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself. ~~~~~~~~lmao