Turnips

I would like to take this opportunity to share, not music, but a recipe. Behold, some turnips.
2 turnips. (Serves 2)
Peel, cut into smallish pieces. Use as dull a knife as possible. Try to break the handle off. They taste better that way, trust me. After first knife is broken, use a table knife.
Boil, 20-25 minutes. Stir occasionally. Towards end of boiling, mash 'em up a bit. Use a spatula.
Drain.
Mash a bit more.
Put in, I dunno, 1/4 cup of butter. Let it melt, mix it around.
Put in a bit of half and half and just enough brown sugar. You'll know.
Mix it around. Drain most of the liquids out.
Serve as soon as possible, otherwise, cover and put in a warm oven.
Directly before eating, or perhaps after a couple bites, put on some garlic pepper salt.

It must be sideways.

Eat it with a spoon. Tastes best around 2:06 AM.


Enjoy.